Breaking into a Bigger Wholeness

Picture me carrying a huge barrel. My arms are barely long enough to grip the sides. It’s heavy. It’s taller than I am so I can’t even see where I am going unless I crane my neck to peer around the sides. It looks uncomfortable, right? But it must be very important since I’ve persisted in carting it around for so long…

This barrel is full to the brim with needs; those of my children, my business, my husband, my friends, my family, and the world at large. I’ve gotten used to carrying it, only occasionally setting it down to take inventory and re-organize. I’ve operated as if there was a limited amount of time, money, and energy to get all these needs met, and I’ve taken it on as my job to make sure it all gets done.

Under “normal” circumstances this is exhausting. But I continue to do it because it makes me an important person in my world. This past month, however, has given me the gift of more than I could effectively manage. Several life transitions coupled with multiple sleep-little nights resulted in one very messy and tearful Gwenn. In a moment of GRACE that I never would have asked for, I dropped the barrel of needs.

And guess what? No one and nothing I cared about shattered or exploded. I allowed myself to have needs, AND get those needs met. (Did you notice that my originally my needs weren’t in the barrel?) Unexpected and loving support showed up in my life and in the lives of those I love. I’ve declared this month a month of radical self care. I scheduled a massage, joined a meditation group, and created wonderful childcare so I can go on dates with my wonderful husband. I am practicing self-discipline to stop working when my intention is to spend quality time with my children or to relax after a day’s work.

I’ve learned, and continually re-learn that the journey of self-care and well-being never ends. But by striving to recognize and meet my own needs I create a foundation to grow the relationships, the work, and the service I want to be true in my life. The journey continues, but wow, the view is so much better without that big barrel in front of me!

Coaching supports us on our journey of self discovery and in the creation of our best lives.

• What fears prevent you from letting your barrel drop?
• Where do you stop allowing for your needs and your humanity?
• How would your life shift if you were to get all your needs fully met?